Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Maidless....

Yup! That's it! I am now MAIDLESS. It happened all of a sudden, I actually went into a state of `shock' after it happened! LOL! It was never intended for us to send her back to the agent unplanned. I was hoping to keep her up until we could get a replacement. But, fate has it that we were going to be maidless as of 1st April 2006, with no forwarning what so ever, up until when God decides that we are once again to have a maid. Until then, it will just be the 3 of us - my hubby, my son and I.

I sent my maid bck to d agent on saturday morning after she told me directly that she is stressed out working with me. She? Stressed out? My goodness! Doesn't she know how much she has stressed me out with her 24hr sour face and bad attitiude?

It all happened because she has yet again forgotten to pack up some things I told her to pack up for me to bring to work the next day (I instructed her on Wednesday nite). When I asked her what had she forgotten, she refused to admit that she had fogotten, even after I had showed her what it was that she had fogotten. What was so `menyakitkan hati' (annoying) was when she repeatedly shook her head, refusing to admit her mistakes. Even after I repeatedly asked her whether she was going to own up, she repeatedly shook her head. Really stubborn this woman! Eh! M stubborn too, *wink* but when I am wrong, it would not take me long to realise my mistake and own up. My guilt wud swallow me up and bring me to my senses within minutes! *grin*

When I told her that she should apologize to me for her mistakes, again she shook in her head in stubborness. Instead, she said to me, "Kalau puan dah tak suka saya kerja disini, hantar saya balik! (in a tone that is so annoying!) Saya stress kerja disini. Semua saya buat, puan kata salah" (If you no longer like me working here, send me back! I am stressed out working here. U find faults in everything I do).

She refuses to admit that she is forgetful, that she is stubborn, that she makes mistakes. She feels that I have no right to remind her when she forgets or correct her when she is wrong bcoz she feels that she is right but I am wrong for correcting her. She never forgets, but it is I who gives her too many things to remember!

I ONLY correct her when she does anything wrong or not according to d way I had taught her. I ONLY remind her when she forgets, and she forgets to do things almost daily, even routine things.

Since she started working for me, exactly 6 months on the 1st of April, I noticed that I cannot give her intructions to do more than one chore at a time. She will not remember. So, I would always have to wait for her to finish one chore before I can give her another. Tiring, dn't U think?

There are times when I cannot wait for her to finish a chore before giving her another because I have other things to do, but if I give her more than one chore to do, but to do them consequetively, she tells me, "mana boleh saya buat semua nie?" (How can I do all this) in an annoying tone. *sigh*

She is still in d country, and according to the agent, trying to secure a job with another employer! I wish the new employer GOOD LUCK! I am still negotiating with the agent to send her back no matter what, since her employment is still in our name. I do not wish for another countryfellowmen to suffer d way I did. It has been so too traumatizing for me with this maid, that I feel if I can just do without a maid, I would.

Also, each time I look at a person from d same country, I cannot help but feel a little bit resentful, you know, like, why are they here if they come to work but not in sincerity? I know I shouldn't generalize, but sometimes I cannot help it. But, for sure, I know that this feeling will go away once I can get her (this maid) out of my head.

Now our government is trying to get them more rights, and the employer is left at a disadvantage. They run away, WE get penalised. Should they not perform to our expectation and we request for a replacement, WE have to pay for everything like as if it is a new application. The agent is not responsible enough to vet through the maids before they come in to ensure that they are good and can perform as what they are here to do - help us make housework light, not burden us further.

Even the minister is not spared. Didn't Dato' Seri Nazri Aziz's maid of 6 years ran away with his money and jewellery worth RM350,000.00? After 6 years of trust! Didn't a trusted maid of 3 years also stabbed her employer after an argument? Can U ever trust them totally?

Your employer trusted you enough (wudn't U if ur maid had worked 4 U for 6 years?) to leave a large chunk of money and jewellery at home, never once thinking that you would be unfaithful and run away with d valuables.

If the maid so much as hate working for an employer, do it properly by discussing with the employer/agent to be sent back legally instead of running away. Yeah! I know they (the maids) have a lot to lose by being sent back, but we, the employers, have spent loads of money already and we DO want our money's worth.

It hurts that we, as the employer, will always be at d losing end. I sometimes sympathize and understand the case of the employer who is suspected of abusing her maid. Although I dn't agree to her abusing another human being, but she must have come to a point when she could no longer take it from this maid who is so `duh' that her patience suddenly snapped after being so patient and tolerant of this person who probably just keeps on annoying her with her (the maids) bad attitude. I could have many times lost my patience with my maid, but, because I have faith in God to help me through the rough tides, I persevered. I thank God for giving me strength and patience.

I am happier now (but sad that she is still in d country) that I no longer need to deal with her, and M free to go out anytime I wish without having to think about what she is up to at home and what I need to bring bck 4 her meals. Only thing is, I hv less time to myself to do ME things like stitching and cardmaking coz I now I hv to do all d housework and cook. We ate out most meals over d last weekend, but I dn't think we can afford to eat out everday.

I am still adjusting 2 a life without a maid. It has been 4 days already. Last nite came back late frm work, after prayers, quickly started dinner....more like heating up food since I still had some leftovers frm Sunday. But, by the time I got dinner done, eaten, clean up, made Milo for everyone, put my son to bed (my hubby helped me with the dishes - thanks, Dear! Love U!), I only managed abt half an hour of stitching b4 my eyes grew watery frm tiredness. Slept at 10 pm. Wanted 2 watch LOST, but I totally got `lost' in slumberland d minute my head touched d pillow! LOL!

It takes time. Although I am enjoying the fact that I no longer need to think abt d maid, M exhausted frm doing even d simple housework coz it has been a long time since I did everything frm A-Z.

Even when I had the maid, I was still doing chores like cooking, organizing things in the house, things like that, but I always leave it to d maid to do the washing, cleaning up, and things like that.

Even b4 I had the maid, I did everything myself, but I was much younger than and without a child. Now dah manja (spoilt) kut. LOL! I can do this, but it just takes some adjusting.

When I told my son that 'kakak' no longer wants to work for us and wants to go home because she misses her mummy, and that he has to help mummy in the kitchen, he said to me, "Aiman kena masak ke?" (Do I have to cook?) I find that so adorable and touching......

1 comment:

ShannyK-L said...

Hi Nik! I understand fully what you've been thru with that maid of yours. My mum actually got a maid also last year to take care of my grandpa in Negri Sembilan! That woman also very slow (very Very SLOW) mentally. So my mum had to teach her from A-Z at my grandpa's place, meaning mum had to move from PJ to NS almost every other week.

The thing is since my mum got high blood pressure and are now menopause, her temper just flares whenever! I also takut to raise my voice with her sometimes over the phone... The maid is still with us and giving alot of headache as usual.

I know its not easy running the house, working and doing your own thing at the same time. But at the very least you have less thing to worry about and YOU ARE IN CONTROL of how things are and should be.

BTW, don't blame yourself for not being able to finish your stitching in time. We only have 24 hours a day and limited amount of energy to do the things we do.